If science could do one thing for pigs, why not enable them to look at the sky? I daresay their astronomy would benefit greatly from this, as previous to the marvelous "breakthrough", if so it should ever occur, their entire system of astronomy has relied on the muddy puddles in their styes! How could we leave them to this terrible fate? We are dead inside if we don't at least wish it could happen.

That's my faux effort for the sake of animal's rights, a phrase of which I will not here note the paradox.